Insights

Thoughtful Insights about life in general.

And then there is you…

| Faith & Life, Insightsby

A son reflects on his father’s life, lessons, faith, and final days — a deeply personal tribute to Abu Hazur (1934–2025).

I close my eyes, and I open them. I breathe in, and I breathe out. Sometimes I speak, but mostly I stay silent. I spend my day in meetings, handling escalations, assigning work, coaching my team, and coding my dreams – always trying to do what is required of me. The daily hustle becomes tough, and I want to stop, but the world is not kind to people who stop. Minutes would turn into months and months into years without me realizing how far back I had fallen. So I put one foot in front of the other, move from one task to the next, and keep going. But sometimes everything comes to a grinding halt. The world keeps on spinning, but I just cannot move. I know that I should move and work and dream and travel and read and write and code – there are still so many things to do… but then there is you… 

Your giant palms are scrubbing Nivea on my tiny 8-year-old face to protect me from the dry Abu Dhabi weather. You and Ammi are going out for a walk, and I, taking advantage of being the youngest, want to tag along. ‘It is a long walk, and you will get tired,’ warns my mother. I don’t know what long and tired mean, but halfway through, I am dragging my feet and dreading the remaining part of the walk. Suddenly, in one big swoop, I am in your arms, my head on your big chest, totally relaxed and comfortable. 

After retirement from the Pakistan Air Force in 1977, you were commissioned in the UAE Air Force. That is where you worked for 17 years till you retired and moved back to Pakistan in 1994. You spent most of these 17 years alone, sacrificing for the education and health of your children. It was only after having kids of my own that I realized how big a sacrifice you made for us.

***

I am lying on my bed sick with Hepatitis and missing you. In the beginning, I didn’t feel much, but now it feels like something was eating me from the inside. My mother is also worried; her brother, my Nasir Mammoo, had succumbed to that same disease a few years ago. The doorbell rings, and you are here, now sitting beside my bed. I still feel weak, but I know that I am going to be fine. You are here. As soon as you had heard about my condition, you applied for leave, booked a ticket, and simply appeared. I needed you, my mother needed you, and without a second thought, you were there. That was the essence of who you were: never hesitate when your family needs you. 

In 1994, you retired from the UAE Air Force and came back to Karachi to live with us full-time. It was the first time in my adult memory that I was living with you for more than a few months. You maintained a very active and disciplined life: waking up early, having breakfast, reading the entire newspaper, and then taking a light nap. After the nap, you would always find something that needed fixing or repairing. From car detailing and repairing broken appliances to AC servicing and fixing shelves, you loved doing things by hand. Often, you would sit and stare at your tools and your latest project, imagining the solution before starting the work. Your projects would often take you to Saddar to hunt for parts in Electronics or the famous Empress market. Instead of a laid-back retirement, you had a very active one.  

If you did not have an active project, you would spend time reading books. I can still see you lying flat on your bed or a sofa with a book on your chest. You could read a book for long hours without getting restless. Once, I remember, you read all eight volumes of Maariful Quran in a few months. You always read non-fiction; politics, current affairs, and history were topics you were most interested in. You loved to watch many sporting events, but snooker and cricket were your favourites. 

***

I am sitting in front of you with my Urdu textbook. One of the things that you were passionate about and I was not was Urdu Ghazals. You used to attend Mushairas, often quote ashaars, and even check and correct the work of some of your poet friends. Meanwhile, I needed to memorize, for my coursework and good grades, explanations of ghazals and essays on the life and works of well-known poets. And I was bored to death doing that. I had made the mistake of thinking that was all there was to Ghazals. So here I was sitting in front of you, hoping that you could transfer some of your poetic skills to me, and I would start getting good grades. 

You asked me to read a Ghazal from the textbook, and I did. There is a smile on your face as you sit semi-reclined on your bed with your hands resting on your chest. Gently, you correct my pronunciation and wazan, i.e., the weights with which some words had to be delivered, especially the radeefs and qaffiyyas. Then you explain the meanings of the difficult words, and then you explain the meanings of the meanings of those words. That is when the magic of poetry starts to reveal itself to me. After a few more repetitions, I am sold on the art of poetry. The next day, I read the Ghazal in my class and stunned my Urdu teacher. She immediately calls out to the class ‘This is how Ghazals should be recited‘ and asks me to read again.  I never got good grades in Urdu, but from that day, I never stopped loving poetry.  

I still read the Ghazals today, not for their deep meaning or the enchanting imagery of their words. I don’t read them for the revolutionary spirit they produce inside of me or the flowers that their romanticism blooms in my heart – I read them instead to maintain a connection with you. To feel, once again, the same way that I felt all those years ago, sitting beside you, with you reclining on your bed and with your arms on your chest.  

It was around those years that the world was beginning to open before me, and with it came the struggles that confront every person from a middle-class background. Without generational wealth to fall back on, whatever we hoped to earn – and whatever comfort we wished to build for our families – depended on gaining admission to good colleges and universities. That was the only path available to us.  

But my educational performances started going South as soon as I left school. From 1992 to 1998, I was performing poorer and poorer with each passing year. I was getting rejected from all the major universities that I applied to – medical and engineering, both. I felt ridiculed, degraded, and started losing faith in myself. You accompanied me through all these failures but rarely showed any frustration or disbelief. I am sure you would have been frustrated on the inside, but on the outside, you kept on nudging me towards the next possible options with your customary phrases, ‘The ball is in your court’, ‘You are the architect of your future’. And all through this time, you never were too close to influence my decisions nor too far for me to feel alone.  

Finally, I got admission in the computer science programme at Bahria University in the middle of 1998. I was a bit apprehensive about being three years late in joining a university. And my anxiety was doubled when someone close said, ‘Kya saari zindagi parhtay raho gay, kuch kamao gay nahee?’  To which you immediately replied, ‘If you want to do computers, you will do computers. I will sell my skin for your education’. A bit dramatic, but that settled all debate. I could feel that invisible swoop and immediate feeling of protection and comfort that I had felt years ago from our walk in Abu Dhabi. Completely protected. Completely safe.  

In all this struggling time, I learned one important lesson for fatherhood. Be not too close and not too far from your kids. Guide them, but let them make their own decisions and then support them.  

The next few years at the University were one of the best phases of my life. Learning subjects that I liked and was also good at, establishing life-long friendships, and also the extra co-curricular activities. All these things played a very positive role in shaping my personality and my future. Once I graduated, I got a job in a start-up without much waiting.   

***

It is sometime in 2006, and after toiling in the garbage, also known as the public transport system of Karachi, I return home. I left home at 8 AM, and it is 9 PM now. I crash on the bed beside you and stare at the roof. Life is fun when you don’t have any responsibilities; life is hard when you have. Besides a gruelling but fulfilling job, I have too many things going on in parallel – I am married, just shifted to a new home, doing Masters and best of all – we are expecting our first child!  

I, staring at the roof, am inundated with emotions of frustration, worry, tiredness, and even elation, wondering how long I could keep up with it. But then I feel your big palms as they gently squeeze my forehead. It was as if you were taking all my worries away for me. You never liked touch, but you liked me. I feel relaxed and want to stay there forever. And in one form or another, I still do return to that safe, relaxed zone – staring at the roof and feeling your palm on my forehead.  

Things kept on moving at a fast pace. By the end of the year, I am a father and also have a new job. The new job has eased my short-term financial worries. Soon, I got a job offer from Kuwait. I am not sure whether to accept it or not. Kuwait only considers wife and kids for family visas, so I cannot take you and Ammi with me. Free video calling is still far away, which practically meant that I would have to forget about my family, which I was not prepared to do. Also, things are financially stable, and as everything new confuses me, I am not very keen to accept the job offer. But you teach me about inflation and how the cost of living will keep on increasing. And how important it is to consider the future of my children over my own emotions. Reluctantly, I accept the offer and move to Kuwait. Within a few years, I found out that it was the right decision that you had made for me.  

It is 2009, and it is your and Ammi’s first visit to Kuwait. Noor Uddin is 2 years old, and you have brought many toys for him, including an orange push car, which all his brothers used. We are a bit worried as he still does not speak. Initially, he was a bit shy, but within a few hours, he is on your lap and even started speaking, and that too, non-stop. He refuses to let go of you throughout your visit. And in many ways, he is still inseparable from you and your memories. There are so many things that I see in him that I saw in you. His reading posture, his usual relaxed, laid-back person, quickly converts into a busy gait and assured steps when work needs to be done.  

During your visit, I also got my driving license. We both go and shop for a new car. You were so proud and happy, and I was so happy to see you happy. I hope that all the anguish you suffered because of my failures is now remedied. I thank Allah for letting you see some of my success.  

***

The many perks in the life of an expat are often accompanied by layers of stress and anxiety. The hustle of a demanding career and a growing family were starting to take a toll on me. There were many times that I needed but was miles away from that swoop where you would pick me up and let me rest my head on your chest, or your giant palm on my head, or you putting Nivea on my face. 

More than anything, there was this dread that age and health would catch up with you like it always does.  And every visit to Karachi would start and end with me checking how older or weaker you had become. But every time I asked, you would always tell me, “Kyon? Mujhay kya hua? I am fine”. And your confident and strong tone would always put me at ease.  

But time was catching up. Hip surgery, prostate surgery, and then multiple brain strokes had started to take a toll on your otherwise energetic gait. You were now walking with a stick. If not as strong physically, mentally, you were still very strong and would always try to walk on your own. But you still would reply, whenever I would ask, “Kyon? Mujhay kya hua? I am fine”. A part of me was always relieved. But now a part of me had started to worry.  

They say that men can never be happy with the present because they are always anxious about the future. My world started turning towards the thought that I might be losing you. While the fear and the anxiety just kept growing inside of me, you kept on telling me, “Kyon? Mujhay kya hua? I am fine’’ 

***

I am holding the door of the car for you. We have come for Juma prayers. I give you my hand so that you can use it to get out of the car. You refuse and signal to me to move away. You want to get out of the car by yourself. Your grandson holds your cane, and you signal him to give it to you. And then after stabilizing yourself, you ask for my hand. I immediately give it to you. You walk a few paces with me, holding your right hand. Your giant palm that once used to calm my nerves, now needed my small hand for stability. But it was not me holding you; it was you who were still holding me. I still needed the comfort and safety that you brought. Just after a few paces, probably realizing my fragile need for reassurance, you push my hand away and start walking on your own. Maybe you wanted to walk on your own, or maybe you wanted me to walk on my own. I would never know, but I stay by your side, not too far and not too close.  

***

It is the summer of 2024, and I am sitting in front of you. Ammi is worried that you have become very quiet over the past few weeks. So I, just like old times, read a ghazal for you ‘aik nanna say larka tha main jin dino’.  Ammi loves how I read it, but you shake your hand and head, signaling “No. Not good”. I laugh. I know I have been a bit off since it’s been a while since I last read Ghazals. But I am pleased that you still had the ear to spot the gaps, and you still loved ghazals so much that you would not accept a below-par reading effort.   

All through the summer, I had wanted to spend as much time with you as possible. Maybe I should have spoken more, but I was afraid that you would get tired, like you often did when you spoke. Maybe I should have gone out with you more, but I was afraid that something would break in your fragile body. I still needed you, I still needed the protection and safety that your presence still provided.  

*** 

It is early October of 2024, and I am sitting beside your bed in the ICU ward of Shifa Hospital. As soon as I heard, I came rushing to Karachi. Multiple strokes have caused your entire body to be paralyzed. You cannot speak or move your body – you cannot even open your eyes. The only thing that seems to be working is your right arm and right ear.  

I know that I am losing you. I know that I cannot do anything. But I refuse to allow helplessness to take over me. I am looking for solutions, I am reading, Google, ChatGPT, anything and everything. I am desperate to know what is going on and how I can fix this. I have to fix this. I cannot let you go. There is still so much help that I need. I am desperate. I hold your right palm, asking, maybe begging for you to stay with me.  

And then you squeeze my hand with your giant palm – not too hard to signal pain, not too soft that I won’t notice. I get up immediately, thinking that you need something. I go up to your ear and say 

‘Abu, you need anything?’  

Promptly, you signal ‘No’ with your right index finger. But then you signal me to speak like someone would gesture ‘come on’ with their hand. I try asking different things you loved and kept yourself updated with, like news and sports. You signaled ‘no’ but prompted me to ask for more. Finally I ask 

‘You want to know about kids?’ 

You give a thumbs up. And I tell you about them. I play their voice messages that they recorded for you. I’ll tell you about my job. About the projects that I am working on and the courses that I am taking. About the book that I am reading. You listen intently and calmly, and then you fall asleep.  

I immediately go back to my search. You can communicate. So all is not lost. Maybe you can open your eyes eventually. Maybe you can speak a few words. I am trying desperately to discover a miracle drug or some experimental research. I remained by your side, searching. Then you move your right arm. Maybe you felt my anxiety, or maybe you were bored. This time, you just take your right arm a few inches above your bed, make a fist with your palm, and then let it fall into my palm. I try to grab it, but then you take it back up and let it fall on my palm again. This is the palm game that we play for the next few moments. I try to understand why you would want to play this game. I don’t get it till I do. You cannot speak, you cannot open your eyes,  you cannot move any part of your body, but still you want to tell me ‘‘Kyon? Mujhay kya hua? I am fine”. This time, I am not ready to believe you. This time, I let my worry and anxiety take over me.  

I pray for more time. I was prepared to spend whatever was needed. I even whispered fall promises in your ear like ‘you would be fine’, and ‘You will be able to speak and open your eyes soon’. I am sorry. But those promises were not for you; they were for me. I wanted you to be fine. Maybe you realized that, as every time I  would say something like that, you would just start playing the palm game, telling me “Kyon? Mujhay kya hua? I am fine.“  

I am back in Kuwait, and your medical complications persist. The prognosis, as one specialist said, is not good, and chances are very grim. We just have to manage the ‘situation’. But I refused to accept. How can I accept the prognosis? Every day, I tried to find a miracle that, at least, you would be able to open your eyes and talk.  

***

We are sitting together – Ammi, Apa, Bhai, Noor, and me. Talking about you. Your room is empty now. A few days back, you peacefully transitioned from this world to the next. My brother tells me that when I left for Kuwait, you hardly spoke through your hands or played the palm game. It probably was a special effort that you made for me, just to tell me that ‘you were fine’ and that I should not get worried.  

***

It has been more than a year now since you left. A year should have been enough to get on with my busy life. But grief can never be cured. There is no medicine or magic to fill that empty void called grief. The only thing that we can do is to continue living with the void and build whatever life we have left around that void. I have learned to keep the grief of losing you in a separate place in my mind. And sometimes, when it decides to come out of that compartment and wreak havoc, I let it because in some weird, desperate way, it becomes a way for me to connect to you and to your memories.  

Your going away does not mean that you have left my heart or my life. You still live deep within me and deep within each of your children. I don’t know how the strange world of barzakh, souls, and the afterlife works. I don’t know how our dreams are connected. But you often come in my dreams, sometimes praying, sometimes talking, and sometimes silent. Sometimes you are enjoying food, sometimes you are walking and busy with some tasks that you have conjured for yourself.   

I still find that many problems can be solved from the words that you commonly used like ‘A man is known by the company he keeps’, ‘It is better to reach late then never to reach’, ‘You are the architect of your future’, ‘The golden rule of never losing anything is to keep things in their correct places’,  ‘The ball is in your court’, ‘I will sell my skin for your education’. Different phrases from different phases of my life. Different phrases that still provide guidance and help whenever I need.  

I still gain so much courage from your unquestionable commitment to following the true path of Islam, as derived from the Quran and Sunnah and as preached by the learned Ulema. I remember to stay not too close and not too far from my kids so that they learn to make their own decisions, and that I support them whenever they need. I remember to accept and work on my mistakes and faults. I remember you.  

Like a photo album, pictures of your memories come in front of me.

    You sitting on your chair, staring at your tools.
    Me, helping out, holding a shelf you are fixing. “Hold it still.”
    You reading for hours without restlessness.
    You, every night, recounting your day to Ammi.

All these memories will, I hope, stay with me for the rest of my life.

And I still see you everywhere. I see you when Saad is reading a book, when Zayyan sits still on his LEGO table thinking and developing a solution in his mind. I see you in the busy gait of Noor and in Saif when he refuses to budge from a thing on which he has decided on.   

I still close my eyes, and I open them. I breathe in and I breathe out. Sometimes I speak, but mostly I stay silent. I spend my day in meetings, handling escalations, assigning work, coaching my team, and coding my dreams – trying to do what is required of me. The daily hustle becomes tough, and I want to stop, but the world is not kind to people who stop. Minutes would turn into months and months into years without me realizing how far back I had fallen. So I put one foot in front of the other, move from one task to the next, and I keep moving forward. But sometimes everything comes to a grinding halt. The world keeps on spinning, but I just cannot move. I know that I should move and work and dream and travel and read and write and code – there are still so many things to do… but then there is you… 

… there will always be you… 

Abu Hazur 
1934-2025 

Monday Morning Meanderings – A philosophical look on modern life

| Faith & Life, Personal Insightsby

Is this what life is? Is this what we are here for? A few clicks here and there. Opening screens, closing screens. Thinking, deciding, delegating, taking ownership. Reading emails, replying to them. Sending some more emails and waiting for their replies. Eight hours per day – spent. Eight hours per day – gone from our lives.  

But this is what makes money. Money that pays the bills. Enhances my quality of life. Keeps me and my family happy and secure. I can buy stuff. Buy books and read them. I can explore fascinating places with my family. I can even help people with the same money. Poor people. Unhealthy people. I can support causes. I can build Masjids. I can buy shops. Start my own business. Give more jobs. Make more money.

But then what is money? A piece of paper. The entire world economy is built on this paper. Every country owes money to another country. Where is the value of money? Who decides which currency, which piece of paper, is stronger than the other? All of it is just speculation. We just assign a number and call it the value of the currency of that country. But if that country goes into war, the ‘value’ of that currency starts falling. But who decides by how much? The country with all of its resources is still there.

But why should I bother about the money? The paper. I didn’t build this paper economy? I don’t manage it. If I have enough of these pieces of paper, I will be safe. My family will be safe. If I, or my creator, keep me out of harm’s way, what do I care about the countries that go into war, or run into economic recessions? I am good and I am fine. Before, people used to work for rice and flour. Now we work for these pieces of paper. What is the big deal then? And when the time comes, when the powers that be decide to pull the plug, I will figure things out then. I will carry my skills to another company, another country. If Allah wills, I will survive. And if HE doesn’t, then who can fight HIS will?

But what if Allah wants me to do something about it? What if Allah is not happy with me just sitting and ranting and writing a blog about it?

This world is temporary. Why should I worry so much about a thing that is temporary? As long as I fulfill my obligations towards Allah, shouldn’t I be fine? Man was given limited control of this world by Allah, and man is crazy. Man will create problem after problem. And then take credit for solving those problems that he created in the first place. When the plug is pulled and the world ends, then we will realize that this was all temporary. This was all, not real. Those who had accepted the temporality of this world would survive and would be happy. And those who had thought that this world was everything. Would suffer. Heavily.

The Wonders of the Limitless Sky 

| Faith & Life, Insights, Travel, Uncategorizedby

I have a special bond with nature – trees, forests, mountains, valleys, and streams, all have enchanted me for as long as I can remember. Don’t even get me started on my feelings for the ocean. In this blog, however, I will be talking about the limitless sky.  

Of all the marvels of nature, the limitless sky is the most accessible. You might live in a congested city and not have the time or the resources to go and live closer to nature. Worry not. The sky is always there to satisfy your nature-loving needs.

Shaped like a dome the limitless sky is set up like a giant canvas, where ‘Al-Musavvir’ enthralls us with various strokes of HIS brush. Sometimes clouds are arranged as straight lines, sometimes round and buffy, and sometimes a mixture – random and yet not looking out of place..

Besides the enchanting nature, the limitless sky also has something mystical. At times when I have felt helpless, overcome by sorrow, or burdened by stress, I have stood and stared up at the sky, calling to Allah Almighty. And immediately grief would be replaced by relief, sorrow by happiness.

In Tafsir Anwar Ul Bayan, Maulana Ashiq Ilahi narrates the 10 benefits of looking at the sky.

1. It reduces sorrow 
2. It decreases negative thoughts (waswasa) 
3. It eliminates fear and doubt 
4. It helps in the remembrance of Allah 
5. The heart fills up with Allah’s greatness 
6. It removes harmful thoughts 
7. It is beneficial during melancholic (Saudavi) conditions 
8. Provides comfort for the longing heart.
9. Bring closeness towards family and friends.
10. It gives a direction for us to make supplications (duas)

Even when the sky is clear it still manages to dazzle with a variety of colors merging into one another.

And then, as if providing a final crescendo of an already breathtaking performance, the sky decides to participate with other wonders of nature like the never-ending ocean and the strong as-ever mountains. The views are just Enthralling and Captivating.

The limitless sky is accessible to everyone. Rich or Poor. Busy or free. Traveler or nontraveler.  
The limitless sky is accessible to everyone – including you!

No matter how busy you are, I hope you can find a few minutes to pause your life and look at the sky (hopefully not while driving or crossing the road). And when your heart is filled with wonder remember to remember the ‘Al-Musavvir’ in HIS own words.  

23:14 So, glorious is Allah, the Best of the creators 

Fighting With Writing 

| Insights, Personal Insights, Uncategorizedby

Sometimes words are desperate to come out of my brain. They are protesting inside and shouting at me that they will not rest till they are on paper. And sometimes, like now, there is nothing. Silence. Nata. Zero.  

It is in this state that I am not writing but fighting. I struggle to find the sweet spot where ideas are translated into words, which string together to form sentences that combine into paragraphs. But in ‘Fighting with Writing’ that does not happen. Either the ideas or the words or both refuse to come out. Refusing like a stubborn child who wants ice cream.  

This whole ‘Fighting With Writing’ thing makes me wonder, ‘Am I actually the one who is writing?’ When the words are coming ‘automatically’ is it me who is putting the words on paper or am I just a tool through which someone else’s stories, ideas, and words are oozing out?  

When I am writing, almost automatically, I find myself doing fewer look-ups, less editing, and even fewer corrections. The whole piece just comes out and settles itself nicely on paper. Like when I wrote ‘Along Came A Virus’. The idea came to my mind when I was tired, had called it a day, and was on my bed hoping to sleep. But the eventual blog had other ideas. The words started shouting in my head, refusing to let me sleep. So grudgingly I came and sat on my computer and started typing. In just a few hours it was done. Posted and even published. It is in this state that probably the best of my work comes out. (Okay I know my best is not even good enough, but I am saying best of ‘my’ work, so the bar is set pretty low 😊 ) 

This fighting sometimes turns pretty violent, wherein, I am prepared to close the screen, toss the pen, and sometimes even delete my blog and everything I have ever written. ‘Oh how light would I feel if I did it’, I tell myself. So how to win the fight and write something of value. Something that at least I would like to read. Well all problems come our way for us to find a solution and in the process, become wiser. And not everything is in the books or YouTube videos. Sometimes we have to learn by experience.  

So I summon the answers from the vast spaces in my mind (which are mostly empty, dull, and boring), and I come up with these points. These would become a solemn pledge, that I promise to follow whenever I am ‘Fighting With Writing’. 

Write Anyways  

Open a blank page and just write. It can be a journal entry where I write manually or an empty Word document. Just open it and pour whatever is in my head.  

Follow a schedule 

Write after Asr prayers for one hour. When the time comes, no matter what I feel, I will write. It can be garbage. It can be intense feelings. It can be curse words or life-changing philosophy. But it would be words connected into a sentence. And sentences connected into paragraphs.  

I am not an impostor 

When my mind tells me that I am an impostor or who am I to tell the world what is good and what is bad and how to live their lives? My reply would be. ‘I am nobody’. And I am not telling the world what to do, rather, I am telling myself what to do. If anything, it is a cry for help.  

The guitar sobs 
The violin weeps 
I shout 
And the world sleeps 

Creativity has cycles 

Creativity might ebb and flow. It might peak and plummet. I shall embrace the cycles. Till the time comes when the words just burst out of me.  

Write I shall 

Write I shall, to calm my nerves. To find a solution. To evade boredom. To make the most out of my time. Write I shall and I shall keep on writing.  

In the end, I get some encouragement when I recall that this fighting with writing feeling, was also faced by a very accomplished writer whom I follow with dedication. The same doubt that my work is so bad that I should destroy it, was also faced by him. His solution was to ‘set a time for writing, prepare the pen, open the blank page, and sit. If nothing is coming it does not matter, just keep sitting till the writing time is over. I guess that is where my unimaginative mind came up with the pledges that I wrote above.  

The accomplished writer was Mufti Taqi Usmani Sahab, whose works I have enjoyed since I was a teenager, and I was surprised that he can also be a victim of ‘Fighting With Writing’. But apparently he was.   

So here I am signing off with a pledge to follow my pledge. Till next time. Chow.  

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire

| Insights, Personal Insightsby

Lately, I have been thinking whether someone can become a millionaire if he follows a template. A template that is advertised in hundreds of articles and YouTube videos. Many books have been written on this topic as well. All of them ‘promise’ to make you a ‘millionaire’. But I guess the million-dollar question (no pun intended) is whether they actually work or not.

The recipe for becoming a millionaire has many ingredients. Like being at the right place at the right time with the right skill set. Persistence and hard work are also quoted as necessary. These ingredients are either purely based on luck or need a massive amount of willpower to pursue.

For me, however, the most important ingredient to the ‘Becoming a Millionaire’ recipe is ‘Risk Appetite’ which almost no one talks about.  

Most of the existing millionaires who promise that they started their business from zero are mostly lying. They didn’t start from zero. They had good support from their family. And did not face the risk of famine or losing shelter if their idea didn’t materialize. Their risk appetite, in other words, was pretty high.

The few who did start from zero were already on the streets. Things were so bad for them that they could only go up. The ingredients of hard work, being at the right place at the right time with the right skills, being persistent, etc all worked for them. They had nothing to lose. But even for these rags-to-riches cases, the success rate is not very cherishable. Millions (again no pun intended) worldwide, fell through the cracks. Things just didn’t work out for them and they stayed in rags and way below the poverty line.  

The problem comes for the majority of people (like me) who fall in the middle class of society. They neither have the cushion to protect their fall nor are hardened by a very tough life. They are used to comfort and a bit of luxury. People belonging to the middle class know that if they lose a few paychecks they are probably going to land on hard ground. Their families cannot support them forever. All they can do is enter a cycle of school > college > university > job/small business > marriage > kids > retirement. And then their kids start the same cycle. In the first half of the cycle i.e. school > college > university, the kids are helped by their parents, and in the post-retirement phase, the parents are helped by the kids. Or, the parents, if they had a long and prosperous career and were a bit wise with their spending and savings would have developed a safety net which includes a home and some savings to take them through the final days of their life.  

This cycle is so constrained that hardly anyone can break out of it. Thus any amount of ‘self-help’ or ‘motivation’ to become a millionaire cannot break this cycle. Each generation of a family has to have long and prosperous careers for at least 3 generations to break the middle-class barriers and enter into the elite class. The class where safety cushions are available for their children to take risks and work on their ideas. But before the barrier can be broken if a family loses a skilled bread earner, they would face the potential risk of going below the poverty line.  

So it is not the lack of persistence, hard work, ideas, skills, etc that prevent us from entering the millionaire club. It is rather our risk appetite, which is very low, that prevents us from breaking into the millionaire club. Maybe in a more people-friendly government that protects the middle class through free education for kids, affordable housing, health care, etc more and more middle-class families can take the risk, but I don’t see that happening any time soon.

So my life has entered a phase, where content promising me ‘millions’, does not hold any attraction anymore. I do not find myself participating in the race of ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire’. The formula for me is to develop gratitude for all that Allah has given to me, work hard, develop enough skills, and balance my income & expenses to have enough savings. I am not complaining. Alhamdulillah the formula has worked well for me and has given me more than I deserved and it would be something that I would be teaching my kids.  

How To Manage Your Finances Without Stress

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You cannot control your income, but you can control your expenses. This live-within-your-means is the best financial advice you will ever receive. And one that will save you from many financial problems and overall stress in the future. In this blog, I give some general tips around this one piece of advice.  

Make Your Monthly and Annual Budgets 

A budget is a plan. You need to start by planning how you will spend your money in the next month. You cannot manage something that is not written down. So write down your plan. I recommend writing your monthly and annual budgets in Excel since it does all the needed calculations and groupings.  

Start by writing your income that you expect to receive next month. Income should be written with a positive sign, and expenses should be written with a negative sign. The expenses can go in broad categories like Rent, Utility Bills, Education, Grocery, Eating Out, Misc, Savings, Installments, etc.  

Once done, a quick summation of this entire column will reveal whether overall, you are in the positive or the negative for the month. Positive is good as it means that your income is more than your collective expenses. And negative is bad because it means that your expenses are more than your income.  

If you are in the positive then a broad grouping of expenses will be fine but if you are in the negative or too close to being in the negative then more detailed categories would be needed e.g. Utility Bills can be broken into Gas, Electricity, Phone etc. 

Once you have written the budget in a single column for the entire month, copy/paste the column to have the budget for the remaining 12 months. Now you have a single column for each month with the same heads for income and expenses. Add/Edit some expenses/income which is quarterly or annual e.g. Bonus, Quarterly School Fees, etc. E.g. if School Fees are expected in March, then they should be added in March.  

Now the budget for the entire year is in front of you. Again, a simple summation (but this time for the entire year) would reveal whether you are in the positive or negative for the entire year. You would also be able to see which of the months are going to be heavy and you might be going in the negative in those months.  

If annually you are in the positive but in some months due to quarterly expenses you fall in the negative then mark those months and make a plan for them. If you are in the negative both on a month-on-month basis and annual then you would need some serious adjustments.

Record Your Expenses As They Happen 

In the Excel file create a separate sheet to record the expenses as they happen during the month. For each expense make sure to mention the ‘Expense Category’ which should be linked to the name of the expense in your monthly/annual budget sheet. This linking of the expenses with your budget will allow you to improve your budget planning.   

If you are in the negative 

If you are in the negative, meaning your expenses are greater than your income, then you are in the red which means that you would need to make some serious adjustments. The goal is to make your expenses less than your income. Remember, that reducing your expenses is much easier than increasing your income. Depending upon how serious the situation is you might need to seriously think about lifestyle changes and/or having difficult conversations with those around you. Some expenses need to be reduced and some need to be dropped altogether. Take your family and your kids in confidence and set the right expectations for them about money and expenses. You would find this conversation difficult initially but very liberating once you have had it.  

Cutting your expenses does not mean that you should not try to increase your income. It is always good to have multiple income streams or get a salary increment or bonus etc. But again, that is hardly under your control. You cannot as easily increase your income as you can decrease your expenses. So focus more on cutting down your expenses.  

Also while multiple income streams might be a good idea it means more work and effort, which may have a negative impact on your health and family life.  

Similarly avoid going into needless investments like buying property or paying installments for a bigger car, if that is going to take you into the negative OR bring your expenses close to your income. As a rule of thumb you should have at least 6 months of your monthly expenses before you start thinking about investments. 

In conclusion under no circumstances allow your expenses to pass your income. Have a healthy gap between your income and expenses since you would need to account for inflation and other unforeseen expenses. Also the closer your expenses start moving towards your income, the more needless mental strain you are inviting onto yourself.  

Delegate The Expense Heads 

If the monthly/annual budgeting and expense recording exercise sounds like too much work for you, then you can always delegate the expense heads amongst your family. E.g. Grocery and Domestic Expenses go to your wife. Tuition Fees, Transport, and Pocket Money go to your children. Etc.  

Delegation would not only free up your mind but also make your children more responsible. Task them on preparing the budget for their expense head, negotiating it with you, and then recording the expenses. If the kids are responsible enough you can even give the entire budgeted amount at the beginning of the month.  

Think Twice about Fixed Expenses 

Fixed Expenses do not change over the period. E.g. Rent, School Fees, etc are fixed expenses. Think twice before introducing a fixed expense in your budget. Because there is no way you would be able to control or reduce this expense for the month or year.  This includes car installments, property investments, etc. No matter what you do, you cannot get out of your Fixed Expenses.  

Include Sadqa as your Budget Expense 

Include Sadqa (Charity) as an expense in your budget sheet. If you are in the negative reduce your other expenses to make way for it. If you are just in the positive, then add a very small amount but do add it. And if you are substantially in the positive then allocate a percentage of your total income as Charity.  

A good way to decide on the amount or percentage that you would disperse monthly as Sadqa is to see which number bothers you just a little. E.g. if you earn 5,000 dollars a month, ask yourself whether 5 dollars a month as Sadqa bothers you or not. If not, start increasing it till you reach an amount that starts bothering you a little. Suppose that amount is 100 dollars which is 2% of your income. Reduce that by just a little e.g. 90 or 95 and start giving it as Charity every month.  

Over the months you would find that you are feeling okay about the 95 dollars and it is not bothering you anymore. Time to increase that amount by just a little that it starts to bother you. 😊 If you still have a healthy gap between your income and expense start increasing the amount till the point that it starts to just bother you.  

Start dispersing Sadqa at the beginning of the month. If you do not support a charitable cause where you can send the entire amount at the beginning of the month, then just keep the amount separately and be on the lookout for any worthy causes during the month and disperse the amount immediately when you come across it. 

Having a planned/budgeted amount, even if it is as little as 1 or 5 dollars would put you on the path of availing the numerous benefits of charity, which I would discuss in another blog.

Include Savings as your Budgeted Expense 

Another important expense that is not an expense but something you need to plan is your ‘Savings’ or ‘Investments’. Initially, your savings target should be to save as much as 6 months of your most important expenses. Once that ‘Savings’ amount is available then start to reserve an amount that you invest in long-term assets. Investment is a topic that I would probably cover in another blog but over here just consider reviewing how much amount you can reserve in the ‘Investments’ expense category.  

One reason that I am calling ‘Investment’ as an ‘Expense’ is because you should not be thinking about pulling your money out of your investments, which means that the amount reserved for investment should be forgotten for the next 3-5 years.  

Envelopes 

This is an age-old expense/budget management exercise. And I am sure most of you are already aware of it. The idea is to divide your income in separate envelopes corresponding with each expense head that you have defined in your budget.  

If making envelopes is too old a practice for you, then check with your bank whether they have something called virtual accounts or ‘Saving Plans’. This allows you to create linked accounts with your main account and at the start of the month either automatically or manually you can move your income into these accounts. So whatever remains in your main account is so low that you stop having any ideas that might lead you towards impulse buying.  

Stay away from impulse buying.  

A fat bank balance might provoke you to buy things that you don’t need. If you are moving your income into different accounts and investments, in the end, you might not have enough money remaining in your account to give you funny ideas about changing your mobile phone or buying a new accessory for your car.  

Whenever you need to buy something ask the questions ‘Do I actually need this?’ or ‘Do I have something similar’, ‘How is it going to help me?’. This would put a block between you and the salesman throwing his pitches. Think before you buy! 

Conclusion 

This might not be an exhaustive list of advice that covers everything. I do realize that everyone has their own unique circumstances and lifestyles. But these tips have helped me a lot over the years. Feel free to share any ideas and suggestions in the comments section.  

Khushoo and Khuzu

| A Better Muslim, Be Productive, Faith & Life, Personal Insights, The Pakistan Dreamby

Khushu and Khuzu are the essential states during Salah/Namaz. Some scholars have even called it obligatory. However, the most common view that most scholars have taken is that the benefits of Salah will start if it is offered with Khushu and Khuzu.

Khushu means to be in a state where your heart and mind are empty of all thoughts and you are fully focused on what you are reading in Salah. And Khuzu is a state in which the body stays still and avoids any type of extra motion e.g. scratching, yawning, flinching, or moving needlessly.

A Salah offered with Khushu and Khuzu has many benefits. The benefits can be felt more than they can be explained.

Khushu and Khuzu can be obtained in many different ways. Khuzu, the stillness of the body can be easily achieved by trying and making an effort.

Khushu, however, requires more inner work. Khushu that is the emptying of mind and heart from all thoughts, can be achieved by

  1. Moving your mind from the thoughts that are generated in your mind to the words that you or the Imam are reciting.
  2. Memorizing new Surahs or portions of Surahs with meaning and reciting them during Salah.
  3. Telling yourself that Allah is much bigger than the thoughts being generated in your mind.
  4. Imagine that you are meeting Allah or that one day you will meet Allah.

Salah is the connection between us and Allah and the stronger that connection is, the more beneficial it would be for us. If we want to realize The Pakistan Dream we need to make an effort to offer Daily Salah with Khushu and Khuzu.

Beyond Politics: The Real Right to Rule

| A Better Muslim, Faith & Life, Insights, Politics, The Pakistan Dreamby

Political debates are pretty common in our country. Usually, they’re about “who is better for Pakistan.” Rarely do they focus on “what is better for Pakistan.” If we look at the manifestos of all political parties, military rulers, and even caretakers, we’ll find a few common themes: education, poverty alleviation, increasing exports, stronger defense, more jobs, and fighting corruption. But if we dig deeper into their hidden agendas, it all comes down to one question: “How do I come into power and how do I stay in power forever?”

My point is that none of these published or unpublished manifestos, really serve Pakistan because they fail to answer one crucial question: “Who has given us the right to rule?” This question matters because we are accountable to whoever gave us that right.

In the Quran, Allah says:
…Allah gives His kingship to whom He wills. (2:247)

This means that Allah gives us the right to rule, making the rulers accountable to Allah and Allah alone. Not to the establishment or judiciary. Not to the various mafias in real estate, agriculture, retail, or sugar. Not to the various superpowers or ‘brotherly’ Arab countries. Not even to the people of Pakistan. The rulers are accountable to Allah and Allah alone. And the reason that the right to rule is given by Allah, is to implement the laws that He has mentioned in the the Quran and Sunnah.

This important factor is not just ignored by our ruling elite but also by us. We too have been given a right to rule—a right to rule over our families, homes, and employees. And most importantly, a right to rule our own lives. We too are required to implement the laws of Allah in the domains that are given under our control.

The real change will come in our lives and our country when we accept this one important fact: Our lives, our children, our money, our fame, our rules, are all given by Allah and Allah alone. And they have been given to us for a reason, which is to implement the dos and don’ts as specified by Allah in the domains that we rule over. Have we done so? And if not, what right do we have to criticize someone who has not implemented them? What right do we have to criticize the rulers of our country? In Pakistan, implementing the laws of Islam is not difficult. In fact, they are quite easy and facilitative. If we still have not implemented these laws or agreed to implement them, then as far as I am concerned, we have no right to criticize anyone else, be it our neighbors, friends, or even our political elite. Everyone is busy disobeying Allah, and we are Everyone.

Asking Questions

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Asking Questions

Lessons from Talks of Maulana Ashraf Ali Thavni

When a question is asked, the sincerity of the seeker should be judged. If the seeker has a genuine intention of following, then he can be answered. Otherwise, we can respond with “I don’t know” or “Ask this question later” etc

Similarly, when we are asking questions, we should evaluate our sincerity and intention as well. And only ask questions with the sincere intention of following. Otherwise, we would have wasted our time and the time of our Shaykh.

The Long Road Ahead

| Be Productive, Insights, The Pakistan Dreamby

The long road ahead is not covered by hard work or perseverance, but by breaking it down into smaller, manageable chunks. Make the chunks so small that moving from one to another will seem effortless. Putting effort into something requires too much effort (duh), so why put so much strain on your body and mind? Just be consistent and keep making smaller strides toward your destination. Once you reach the destination, people will admire your stamina, perseverance, and hard work, while you will be looking for the next long road…

Lessons on greed from Abha

| A Better Muslim, Insights, Saudia Arab, Travelby
View from Dahab Walkway Abha

Whenever you embark on a journey, the unfamiliar surroundings and challenges can serve as profound teachers. The lessons learned in such moments are often etched into your memory, as they come amidst the backdrop of perseverance and a tested spirit. In a foreign land where roads and pathways are unfamiliar, and your mind and body may feel defeated, it is your soul that propels you forward. Nature, in these moments, imparts lessons that penetrate not just your body and mind but directly enter into your soul, leaving lasting imprints.

During my trip to Abha last year, I encountered a valuable lesson that shed light on a hadith I had heard many times before but now understood on a deeper level.

On a crisp morning, my wife and I ventured onto the Al Dahab walkway. The view was stunning. The mountains that surrounded us were a spectacle, with layers resembling the folds of a fully opened curtain, gracefully curved. Stretching as far as the eye could see, these majestic mountains framed the landscape. Between them, roads snaked through the terrain, accentuating the awe-inspiring beauty of the scene. However, what truly captivated me was the deep valleys nestled between the mountains. These valleys were so profound that the cars traversing the roads below appeared minuscule, resembling tiny mice scurrying through the vastness.

It was at that time that the hadith on greed raced into my mind.

“If the children of Adam possess a valley of gold, (still), he would wish that he has two valleys. And his mouth would never be filled except with sand. And whosoever makes Taubah to Allah azza wa jall, his Taubah would be accepted.”

(Bukhari; Muslim Shareef)

Standing on the sidelines, I imagined the valley in front of me, filled with gold, but not being enough. I thought about my yearning for just a ‘little’ bit more so that I may fulfill some more of my desires. I thought about millionaires aspiring to be billionaires and billionaires wanting more. Nothing, it seems, is ever enough for us. This thought made me realize that this perpetual desire for accumulation could be a profound spiritual ailment. At that moment, I made a heartfelt dua to Allah, pleading,

‘Ya Allah, protect me from such an illness, for I do not know how to protect myself’.

Standing there I started counting what I had and thanking Allah for each blessing. I started comparing my luxurious life with people with far less and still being happy and thankful for what they had. I started to think about how all of these blessings are not because of my effort but only because of the profound blessings of Allah.

Lessons from nature have a unique way of penetrating the soul, leaving us with insights that linger long after the journey has ended. This encounter, at least for me, served as a reminder to appreciate the blessings we have and to guard against the insatiable desire for more.

What is the Purpose of Life?

| A Better Muslim, Be Productive, Insights, Personal Growth, The Pakistan Dreamby

Why we need to know the answer

Imagine you are on a train, but you don’t know where it’s going. You don’t know why you are on it, or what you’re supposed to do when the train stops. You are sitting there, watching the scenery pass by, wondering what’s next. That’s what it feels like to live a life without purpose.

You might be traveling on a luxury train and have pleasant company and great food. Even the scenes might be breathtaking. But every few minutes you would be reminded of the fact that you don’t know why you are on the train. Who put you on it, where are you headed, and what you are going to do when the train stops? These questions would constantly bother you and beg you to answer them, no matter how luxurious your ride is.

Now imagine, you have the answer to all these questions, but the train ride is not very comfortable. The AC is not working, the food is not good, and unpleasant people surround you. But deep inside you would have peace because you know that the train would eventually stop bringing you to a destination of your choosing.

In the first instance, even with all the comforts you would feel uneasy, while in the second case with all the hardships you will have warmth and comfort in your heart, and you would be at peace. That is why it is so important to find the answer to the question of the purpose of our life; why we are alive?

Man’s Pursuit for Answers 

This is the reason why man has always tried to answer the question; who gave us life and why? In their pursuit, different men took different paths. Some tried to create the answers and ended up creating man-made religions and philosophies that had varying degrees of popularity and acceptance. But such philosophies, religions, or ways of life, had a severe disadvantage. They were restricted by the capacity of the human mind and intellect. As a result, they were easily challenged, modified, or rejected by humans with a higher intellect or information.  

The other path was to find rather than create the answers. This path started with the understanding that ‘someone’ put us on this earth and gave us life for a purpose. That the thing we call ‘nature’ is also a creation just like us. Created to ensure life. These people found answers to their questions in ‘Abrahamic Religions’ like Islam, Christianity, and Judaism. All of these religions provide not abstract but concrete answers to these questions i.e. ‘Life has been given by God’ for ‘Gaining HIS proximity and acceptance’. Humans do not create these answers but rather are told by God HIMSELF through HIS Prophets (messengers) and Holy Books.

How Islam Defines the Purpose of Life 

Islam has not only given these answers in the Quran and Sunnah but has also taken many steps further. It has told us who God is and what are HIS traits. It has told us that the purpose of our creation is to ‘gain HIS proximity by worshipping HIM’. And the reason that HE created ‘life and death’ was to judge who performs the most noble deeds. Islam has also listed the acts of Worship and clearly defined how they are to be performed. It also classifies deeds into Good and Bad.

We are not left at the mercy of ‘Abstractions’ and ‘Interpretations’. What has been defined is to be followed. What has not been defined has been deemed not important to the ultimate purpose of life. So it can be interpreted in whatever way we see fit and fruitful.

Impact on my life

For me, knowing the answer to the question of the Purpose of Life through Islam is not only comforting but also keeps me focused. I understand why I worship Allah and recite the Quran. Why I got married and have children, why do I need to work and earn for my family, and also focus on the upbringing of my children? Why I need to be as productive as I can be and why I need to focus on my health and fitness. Why do I also need to go out and enjoy the various experiences that this world has to offer with my family and friends? The answer to all these questions is that Islam has categorized them as acts of ‘Worship’. And I need to perform them to gain proximity to Allah my creator.

Knowing these answers also insulates me from hardships and suffering. Islam tells me that hardships and suffering are also created to gain proximity to Allah. This journey of life on earth has to end one day. So it does not matter how luxurious or not the journey is. Eventually, when my life ends, based on how successful I have been in fulfilling the ultimate purpose, I shall enter a life full of luxuries that will never end. That life, the destination, is much more important.

Conclusion

The biggest question about life can be answered in a single sentence:

‘We are created by Allah, for HIS worship, so that our deeds become noble and worthy of acceptance by HIM, earning us HIS proximity and acceptance’.

What Time Is

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You can tell people what is the time, but it is very difficult to tell them what time is!

Recently, I was teaching my kids what time is. And I was at a loss for words. How do you explain what time is? You can teach people how to tell time. You can tell them how to manage time. But how do you define time?

So I did some research to understand what time is, only to find out that time is the scariest thing in this world.

Dictionaries define time as

Time is the continued sequence of events that occurs in an irreversible succession from the past through the present and into the future.

I read it several times to understand and then several times more just to figure out how to explain what time actually is. I ended up breaking the definition of time into smaller parts and that is when things turned scary.

  1. Time is the continued sequence of events, which means that time is continuous and that it never stops. It keeps moving.
  2. Time is a sequence of events, which means ‘something is always happening’ and they are happening in a ‘sequence’ i.e. one after the other. At any point of time an event is thrown at us and we are expected to respond to it.
  3. The events occur in an irreversible succession. You cannot go back in time. So time does not give you the chance to go back and fix your mistakes.
  4. And the final part is, since time never stops and it never moves backward, then it means that time always move forward bringing us from the past, through the present and taking us into the future.

At the end of my explanation, my kids were yawning but my eyes were fully lit up! I guess I never put a lot of time into understanding what time actually is. And now that I had studied it carefully I realized that time is the scariest thing in this world. Why? Because time is going to continuously move forward and throw an event at you asking for a response from your side. And if you are not prepared for it, you lose and time wins. Whatever the result of your previous battle you can’t stop to celebrate or sulk, as time never stops, it just moves forward and throws another event at you. You don’t get time to recover, you don’t get time to celebrate. Whether you want it or not time will move forward. Whether you like it or not, it will throw an event at you. And you have to respond. You can’t quit, you can’t hide because in essence time is always with you.

But all is not gloom and doom. One common thing that you would find in successful people from any walk of life, is that they have embedded this definition of time deep within themselves. At any point of time, they seem to be ready to respond to the event thrown at them. And when they fail, like all humans do, they just get up and get ready for the next event. They keep riding the wave of time as an expert swimmer would. Not stopping, not resting, not sulking about this wave or that. They know, like the swimmer knows, that if they stop they will drown or might never reach the shore. They have to, and they do, keep moving forward. They are prepared for all possible outcomes. They know that their responding action will dictate the next event that time throws at them. So they design their responses accordingly. e.g. They know that they might fall sick, so they adopt healthy habits, they know that one day they would retire, so they save and invest, they know that one day they would die, so they prepare for the hereafter.

And the final scary part. Time is continuous and all continuous things will eventually stop. Time too, at one point, will stop…

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I would really love to hear your feedback. So drop a comment

The Spider’s Web

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Have you ever seen a rat wheel? It is a small wheel in a small cage. The tiny rat, climbs into the rat wheel, you want to see him play. So you hang a cheese in front of the wheel. The rat swings his legs with massive speed. With each gallop, he feels that he is closer to the cheese, but the more he runs, the more he stays in the same place.

Today’s world is abundant with answers but barren in questions. So let me ask you a few questions, you might have or should have asked, as you moved through life. Right questions sets you in the right path, isn’t it?.

Remember, the best friends you used to have in school. You were in-separable. Life without them; unimaginable. However time moved on. You got separated and grew up. Now you don’t even know where they are. Were they able to achieve their dreams? Were you? Even if you meet them now, so much would have changed, that the chances of you becoming best friends again, are rare. Have you ever wondered; what happened?

Then there was your first love. You were sure. They were the key to your happiness. Life without them; unthinkable. However you grew out of your love. You might have even forgotten their names or how they looked like. It was so long ago. And even if you are to meet them now, the chances of your heart missing a beat, are none. Have you ever wondered; what happened? How can it be? Why things change?

Now you move ahead in life. College, university and job. All of it happens in a flash. And then marriage. And then you start to see yourself in your kids. Everything should be settled by now. But now you have some more questions.

Streets are full of talented people and palaces are full of morons. Have you ever wondered?

Money; you are sure. You just need a little bit more to have a happy life. But as you jump from one desire to another, you wonder; when would it be enough?

This world is like a spider’s web. The more we try to get out of the meaningless and the mundane, the more we get buried in it. But then you move ahead in life, and now your eyes start seeing less, and you start having some more questions…

Is this world a transient station or a destination? If it is a station, where are you headed to? If it is a destination, why you need to leave?

Strange is the world, isn’t it? Especially if you don’t get the answer to all your questions, and stranger are its ways…

The rat, wakes up. He sips some water and eats. And then looks at that extra bit of cheese, hanging from the roof of his home. He climbs the wheel. And starts to swing his legs. He needs to have that cheese. It seems to be coming closer to him. It starts to swing towards him. He is almost there. He is able to take a small bite before it swings away. He loved the taste. He feels that he has accomplished something. He needs to go at it again. He starts swinging his legs faster. He is about to reach it again. His body is aching. But he is very close. He is about to get that extra bit of cheese. He never needed it in the first place. But now he wants it. He comes very close. It is so near…

…but suddenly. He trips. He falls down. His heart is beating very fast. Too fast. His eyes are still fixed on the swinging cheese. He tries to get up. He was very close. He needs to try again. But he cannot feel his legs anymore. Life, is slowly leaving him. His heart is now stopping. He was very close. He sees the cheese one last time as he closes his teary eyes. He knows that the end has come.

Not a second more.
Not a second less.

Now the cheese is not for him. Someone else will replace him. Someone else will repeat the same cycle, with the same vigor; and sadly with the same fate. The next rat in the wheel will not learn from his predecessor. Have you ever wondered; why…
… or will you ever wonder, that the next rat in the cage

Is Actually You!?

The New Normal

| Insights, Politicsby

The sound of Azaan (the call for prayers) enters my room along with a cool breeze through an open window. Under normal circumstances, I would get up, perform Wuzu (ablution), call on my kids, Noor and Saif, and together we would head towards the Masjid. This was our routine, this was normal.

But times are not normal anymore. In Kuwait, like in many other parts of the world, to prevent the spread of corona virus Masjids are closed and Azaans are accompanied by two additional lines.

As salatu khairum min buyutuk
(Praying at home is better)

Just like me, lives of millions around the world are defined by similar routines. Be it early morning walks, after office gym, weekend movies, or family picnics. Just like mine, all these routines, today stand disrupted, causing agony and confusion. Every where that I look, people are trying to deal with this new reality; some with denial and the others with moderate to extreme precaution.

I must admit that initially it was all very novel. The buzz words ‘Work from home’, ‘More time to learn a new language or skill’, ‘Sleeping without alarms’, ‘Spending more time with children and famliy’, were fascinating to say the least. But then the novelty started to wear out. The numbers of infections started to increase, economic realities started to hit us. ‘What If’ started to capture our minds. Despair, confusion and fear started to creep in. Smokers who had quit; started to smoke again. ‘there is nothing else to do!’, they would say. We the humans, who were control freaks by nature, suddenly started to lose control. Nothing remained in our hands anymore. Everyone glued themselves to a screen, telling them the latest numbers. The new normal  as it was being called, started to wear off. No positive stories were coming through and the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel, was no where to be seen.

Meanwhile the buzz words changed to ‘The situation is expected to stay as is for a couple of years’, ‘Herd immunity might not work’. ‘Economic hardships would last even longer’. There is gloom every where and an expected doom, most likely just around the corner. No one can say what is going to happen, how we are going to get out of it. Are there other viruses waiting to hatch? Can something bigger hit us?

Although most of the despair is justified to an extent, but the reality is a bit different. While we cannot be sure about what is going to happen, but we can be sure about one thing.

Human beings are survivors.

As human beings, we have outlived more powerful species. We have outlived genocides, ethnic cleansing and racial discrimination. We have come out of wars, famine, floods and earthquakes. Hiroshima and Nagasaki came out of the worst possible calamity that anyone can ever imagine. We came out, although with scars, but we came out. That is how we are designed by our Creator. One way or the other we always find a way and continue to live on. Till the time, the Creator of this world decides to wrap up, things will continue to move forward. We will become better, smarter, learn from our mistakes and ensure that we leave a better world for our coming generations. As long as equality, justice and tolerance is embedded in our actions, like it is in our vast majority, we will continue to not only survive but progress.

It doesn’t matter how many routines are disrupted world-wide; it only matters how many new ones are created.

The sound of another Azaan enters my room. But this time from the slightly open door of my room. It is my son, the designated Muazzin (person who gives Azaan) of our home, who is calling us to prayer. I get up from my chair to perform Wuzu and perform Salah with my entire family. Masjids outside might be closed but we, like many others, have converted our home into a Masjid. I move to enter into a new masjid. I move to enter into a new normal.